Wuv, True Wuv...

(I didn't take this picture, but it is so cute...)

I recently had an argument with someone, you know who you are, and you know I still love you, we just disagree. The statement I made that they disagreed with was “There is no reason for two people who are actively perusing God to get a divorce.” Their argument was that I had never been in a bad marriage, and they had. Actually, let’s see I’ll call you… Kira, I don’t know any Kiras, and if a Kira reads this, you’ll know the name is a pseudonym. So anyways… Kira said “You don’t know, you’ve never been in a bad marriage.” Well that shut me up for a minute or two… However, I am kinda funny that way, if something bothers me I have to simmer on it. Not as in getting mad, but just honestly consider it, sift it, and decide how I feel about it. I learned long ago not to trust my emotions. Emotions are like a runaway dog that needs to be leashed and told where to go. No matter how I feel that doesn’t make it true. If I make the right choices, the right emotions will follow.

For example… (haha wish the dots made noise, dut dut duuu) lol I don’t always feel love for my husband, but I always love my husband. I CHOOSE to love him, but the warm fuzzies got a cold shave many years ago… But because I keep choosing to love him every day, eventually the warm fuzzies come back… and leave, and come back… Does that mean I stop loving him when I don’t feel it? No, I am committed to him. I choose to love him even when I don’t feel it.

Now that is why it hit me a few days later, I have been in a bad marriage. We have had days, months probably even a year that we… well let’s just say love is not an accurate word for what we felt at that time. I fall out of love every day and jump right back in.

Love and Marriage...without cats.

Tomorrow is my 14th wedding anniversary, in honor of my marriage , here is one of two MICROBURSTS! on my marriage I am going to post.

Forgive and Forget?
Okay, at least forgive and bury it. Way back in the beginning... well almost. Way back in the beginning of mine and Que’sour marriage, we had a cat that shall forever be known as the worst dumbest cat in the world.
A pet store was giving away free kittens (it was a bad sign for her that she was free), and they were long haired so I wanted one! Well, Que didn't feel my passion for this kitten, especially since we had a cat and a dog. However, I begged, pleaded, “pleased,” and made puppy dog faces until he gave in.

You have to have forgiveness to give forgiveness and you have to give forgiveness to get forgiveness.
Honestly, I think the kitten was brain damaged. That was the dumbest cat in the world. Dumb as dirt. At any rate, after almost a year and more than enough grief, the cat went away. Praise God.
Nevertheless, her legend took a lot longer to die. For five or six years, every time I wanted something that my husband didn't want, he would say, “Remember the cat?” and I would give in.
Obviously, he had better judgment than I did!
That isn't really true. My darling Que was using the cat to manipulate me so he could get his way. He has since repented and realized,

True love keeps no record of wrongs!
I Corinthians 13:5

Maybe you can’t forgive and forget it, but you can forgive and let it go!


DaNella
Proverbs 3:5-6

You and Me...

" When I'm with you everything and everyone else just fades away..."

I love my husband. He is so precious. Here is a picture of us at Christmas 2001. We were youth pastors, in Vincent Al. We had four kids, 5, 4, 1, and 5 mos. Yeah, you read right. We were living in a little 800 sq ft house, a parsonage. No we weren't rich, but we had love... and lots of fights over money, or lack there of. We fought because I didn't keep the house clean enough... (duh with 4 little ones, anything I did was undone in record time. Not to mention the fact that I was breastfeeding the littlest, and I was sleep deprived. )

My point is Love is a choice. We choose to love someone or choose to hate someone by the choice thoughts we choose to think about someone. Tonight as my husband was leaving to take the boys to wrestling practice, I asked him to put his bowl in the sink. Did he? No. Is the bowl even at this moment sitting where it was when I asked him? Yes. Will I forgive him? I already have. I forgave him before he forgot to do it. Why? How? When I asked him to do it, I choose that even if he forgot I would not be mad. Why? It makes my life easier. Why waste my time being mad at him. Just put the stupid bowl in the sink, and go on with life.

I Choose to love my husband.